Archive for the ‘Abstinence’ Category

Monogamy and happiness

Friday, March 18th, 2011

Referencing a Centers for Disease Control report this month that teens and twentys are waiting longer to have sex, New York Times columnist Ross Douthat tackles the subject of premarital sex.

In 2001, the study reported, 22 percent of Americans aged 15 to 24 were still virgins.  By 2008, that number was up to 28 percent.  Other research suggests that this trend may date back decades, and that young Americans have been growing more sexually conservative since the 1980s.

Why is this good news? … [because] there are different kinds of premarital sex.  There’s sex that’s actually pre-marital, in the sense that it involves monogamous couples on a path that might lead to matrimony one day.  Then there’s sex that’s casual and promiscuous, or just premature and ill considered.”

Monogamy matters, says Douthat, citing the research of two sociologists who authored a recent book, “Premarital Sex in America.”

Their research, which looks at sexual behavior among contemporary young adults, finds a significant correlation between sexual restraint and emotional well-being, between monogamy and happiness – and between promiscuity and depression.

This correlation is much stronger for women than for men.  Female emotional well-being seems to be tightly bound to sexual stability – which may help explain why overall female happiness has actually drifted downward since the sexual revolution.

In a follow-up blog post pivoting off a post by feminist Dana Goldstein, Douthat challenges progressives’ and feminists’ “reflexive hostility” to any criticism that the 60s sexual revolution has changed American sexual culture for the worse, “out of a fear that one concession will cost women every gain.”

Needless to say, I don’t think this is the right way to look at it.  The connection between feminism and sexual permissiveness strikes me as historically contingent rather that strictly necessary, and the economic and social gains that women have made since the 1960s seem robust enough to endure – or, more likely, continue apace – even amid a reconsideration of some of the social changes that accompanied them.  Yes, an ethic of sexual restraint can be turned to patriarchal ends, but so can an ethic of sexual permissiveness, as anyone who’s hung out in a frat house for any length of time can attest.

And the fact that smart feminists like Goldstein feel compelled to act all blasé … lest they give an inch to the forces of reaction, seems like one of the more regrettable aspects of the contemporary cultural debate.

Douthat’s column and post are worth reading.

“Doing it” less, later

Friday, March 18th, 2011

The Centers for Disease Control delivered a little healthier news report about the sexual behaviors of the 15- to 24-year old age group:

Fewer teens and young adults are having sex, a government survey shows, and theories abound for why they’re doing it less.  Experts say this generation may be more cautious than their predecessors, more aware of sexually spread diseases.  Or perhaps emphasis on abstinence in the past decade has had some influence.

Or maybe they’re just too busy.

“It’s not even on my radar,” said 17-year-old Abbey King of Hinsdale, Ill., a competitive swimmer who starts her day at 5 a.m. and falls into bed at 10:30 p.m. after swimming, school, weight lifting, running, more swimming, homework and a volunteer gig working with service dogs for the disabled.

The study [released March 3, 2011] is based on interviews of about 5,300 young people, ages 15 to 24.  It shows the proportion in that age group who said they’d never had oral, vaginal or anal sex rose in the past decade from 22 percent to about 28 percent.

There are other surveys of sexual behavior, but this is considered the largest and most reliable.  “It’s the gold standard,” said Bill Albert, chief program officer for the National Campaign to Prevent Teen and Unplanned Pregnancy.

Read the AP news release here.

Study: Delaying Sex = More Stable Relationships, Satisfying Sex

Thursday, January 13th, 2011

bride-groomkneelingA new study by researcher Dean Busby and colleagues, published in the most recent Journal of Family Psychology, has WebMD and LiveScience talking.

Each article takes a slightly different focus in reporting the study’s findings:  couples who had sex the earliest – such as after the first date or within the first month of dating – had the worst relationship outcomes, while those who waited enjoyed more stable relationships and more satisfying sex over the long haul.

Here are excerpts from each:

(more…)

Abstinence Good for More than a Laugh?

Thursday, October 28th, 2010

Comedian Stephen Crowder takes a look at sex and abstinence.

As a stand-up comedian, I’ve seen hacks openly depict the most depraved, explicit sexual acts they can think of just to get a laugh out of the audience.

Everything is on the table except …

Today there is one area of sex that when discussed still makes people’s posteriors pucker with discomfort … abstinence.  The idea of abstinence has become somewhat of a punchline in this country.

[snip]

If you’re abstinent it’s either because A) you’re ugly or B) you’re a loser.

[snip]

Maybe it’s just the lack of fun-factor, or maybe it started with harlotry being misused as a fulcrum for women’s liberation, but if you so much as suggest to someone that abstinence might be beneficial, you’ll often find yourself vilified as a judgmental jackass faster than Bill Maher can throw up his dainty hands.

Sure, Michelle Obama can run around the country and condemn little fatties for inhaling Little Debbies, but if you try and apply the same helpful, healthful concept to sex, it’s seen as pushy and/or prudish.

One often overlooked benefit of abstinence is deep mutual trust:

I can tell you beyond any doubt that my lady is able to control herself and stick to her values regardless of circumstance.  Just as surely, she can say the same about me (Ben&Jerry’s benders notwithstanding).  It is that display of self-control, that tangible example of living your principles through your life’s walk, that ensures her that I won’t be jumping on the first well-proportioned opportunity that comes my way.

Constantly we hear cries of women aimed at their supposedly overly jealous boyfriends, “What’s the matter?  Don’t you trust me?”

No, he doesn’t.  You slept with him on the first date and there is no reason for him to think that you wouldn’t do the same when a better offer comes along.

While we’re on the subject, has the whole floozie shtick really empowered any women out there?

[snip]

Then again, what do I know?  I’m just a young, sexless, STD-free-moron in love.  You should try it sometime … though I’m not here to judge.

Is Hook-Up Fatigue Setting In?

Wednesday, April 21st, 2010

It looks that way.  Stephanie Chen’s CNN article, No Hooking Up, No Sex for Some Co-eds, reports students are choosing to disengage from the often alcohol-fueled hook-up scene that leaves many women with a hangover of the blues even if they manage to avoid getting a sexually transmitted disease. 

It shouldn’t come as a surprise.  While some researchers have found no long-term harmful psychological damage from hooking-up, other studies, writes Chen, “have shown the instability from hooking up can cause depression.  Repeated rejection and detached relationships can also damage self-esteem.”  Even researchers who discount psychological damage warn that the hook-up culture has become a “direct route for spreading STDs,” since those who practice this type of sex tend to engage with many more partners.  

A growing body of evidence suggests women and men have very different morning-after reactions to friends-with-benefits, hooking up, and similar nonromantic sexual relations.

(more…)

A little good news for abstinence-only sex ed

Tuesday, February 2nd, 2010

“Abstinence-only sex education doesn’t work” has been repeated so often that it’s become holy writ.  Now comes a little good news for the much maligned program. 

A two-year National Institute of Mental Health-funded “randomized trial of several interventions, including abstinence-only” showed  “a “statistically significant benefit” for the abstinence approach:   it was more effective in delaying sexual initiation.

John Gever, senior editor of MedpageToday, summarizes:

(more…)

CDC Panel Games the Data on Abstinence Programs

Tuesday, November 17th, 2009

Much was made a couple of months ago when the Centers for Disease Control released a report on the effectiveness of various sex education programs (“Meta-analysis of Group Based Interventions to Prevent Adolescent Pregnancy, HIV and other STIs”). 

“Abstinence-only Sex Ed Rejected by Expert Panel,” announced one pop-medical site headline, writing “there’s no evidence that abstinence-only sexual education programs cut teens’ risk…”   In a see-I-told-you-so tone, the article added that the CDC Task Force report recommended “group-based comprehensive risk reduction (CRR) programs that focus on condoms and delaying sexual initiation.”

Unfortunately the article’s headline and conclusion – indeed the CDC’s report itself – are erroneous and misleading in light of a Minority Report published on November 7 by members of the Task Force.   It looks like the CDC gamed the data to get the result it wanted.  Worse, the CDC is apparently refusing to release the quantitative data for public scrutiny.

(more…)

Sex ed leaves much to be desired

Tuesday, September 22nd, 2009

The University of Alabama Kaleidoscope published an interesting point/counterpoint yesterday on the subject of sex education generally — and abstinence specifically – here.  

(more…)